A New Day, A New Year ... Welcome 2016!

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Tomorrow reigns in a brand new year. I can't believe another year has already come and gone! Isn't that the funny thing though, the days go by so slow, but looking back on the year feels like it is speeding by.

I'm not a fan of new year's resolutions. I haven't made a list in years. Instead, I chose to do something a little different. I decide on a word that represents a challenge for me to grow in an attempt to better myself over the course of the year. This past year my word was confidence. Over the course of 2015, I have increased my confidence in myself and my abilities greatly. I look forward to my new challenge in the new year.

In 2016, my challenge is resilience.

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Resilience has two meanings: the power or ability to return to the original form, position, etc, after being bent, compressed, or stretched; and the ability to recover readily from illness, depression, adversity, or the like. (Dictionary.com)

I tend to shrink whenever I am challenged. Instead of defending myself, I dodge the situation often running the opposite way. Resilience allows me to bend without breaking, building upon my newly found confidence, to be able to stand up for myself.

I also tend to feel guilty whenever I make a mistake and beat myself up about it. Resilience gives me the ability to recover and move on without self-condemnation, but the determination to do and be better.

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I look forward to beginning the publication process on my novel, which I am going to need resilience as I begin to receive feedback and criticism.

I'm sure there are cases where resilience will help me that I haven't even thought about yet. I'm excited to find out how much this character trait will help me become a better me. And how it will help me overcome my fears, insecurities and depression.

I look forward to 2016 and everything it has to offer. On the other hand, I am excited for what every day has to offer, whether it's the first day of the year or the last, a Monday or a Friday. Looking back on how quickly a year goes by, I want to focus on living in the moment and enjoying every part of life, the times of quiet solitude, overcoming struggles and joyous triumphs.

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Tomorrow is a new year and with that often comes this eagerness to change who we are. I don't want that, I like who I am. However, I can always be better. I can always learn more and grow as a person. That is what I want for the next year and the next day. For tomorrow I will wake up on January 1st, the beginning of 2016, but it will also be Friday, the end of this week. And I will enjoy the day and be thankful to be alive and surrounded by family and seek out goodness.

Live well and without fear, 

laugh every chance you get 

and love with all of your heart.

Cheers, Friend!

Happy New Year!

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The Best Decade Ever...Happy Anniversary My Love!

Ten years ago, September 22 fell on a Thursday. On this day a neighbor and mutual friend of mine and Stephen's invited us both to a pot luck dinner. Neither of us knew that this seemingly insignificant event would change both our lives forever.

2005

Nine years ago, September 22 fell on a Friday. I had high hopes for the day as I traveled from Clemson University in South Carolina to Orlando, Florida to visit my boyfriend who as working at Electronic Arts at the time. It was our one year anniversary and I couldn't wait to see him. What waited for me was a huge surprise: flowers, wine and a ring. I didn't hesitate to say "yes" to Stephen's proposal.

2006

Eight years ago, September 22 fell on a Saturday. We spent the day with family and friends on a beach in Treasure Island, Florida. We said "I do," smashed cake in each other's faces and drifted away on a cloud. I was then, and still am, so proud to call myself Mrs. McCusker.

2007

This year Stephen and I have been together for 10 years. That is a whole decade of living together, sharing life together and supporting each other.

A lot happens in a decade. You become a different person after ten years. Think about it. When you are age 10, you are kid. At 20 you are an adult. So wouldn't it seem logical that at 30 you become something different entirely. That every 10 years would bring a defining characteristic about yourself that you may not be able to define previously.

One of the things that I truly believe make a couple work together over time, besides honest communication, is the ability to let each other change, grow and mature. It is surely true in romantic relationships, especially marriage, but the need is there in any type of relationship.

For the last 10 years that Stephen and I have known each other, he has been playing and writing music. His music is one of his greatest assets, one of the many things that made me fall in love with him. It allowed me to see who he was and how he thought through different events and emotions. Music is how he first told me he loved me. He wrote a song and played it for me at a park in Clemson, SC one week after we met. It was a perfect evening, especially since I already knew I loved him too.

Now, 10 years later, I feel like his music has a piece of me in it. Over these years while we have met many different types of people, lived in many places, worked several types and levels of jobs, been in and out of church, witnessed births and endured deaths of several people we loved including our own three miscarriages. We have also created a life together that we cherish dearly, our daughter Zoey.

2005

We have grown and changed and overcome many obstacles together. I love that I am able to share my life, hopes, dreams, fears and short-comings with this wonderful man who always makes me feel like I am the most precious person in this world. I can do anything when he believes in me.

I has been the best decade. I am so grateful and damn lucky that I found this man that makes me better and loves me with his whole being. I can't wait to see what the next 10 years will hold. And the ten after that...and so on and so forth. I am so glad that I get to spend my days and years with him.

2015

Happy Anniversary, my love! It has been the best decade. It is the greatest life. I love you!

Life During the Teacher's Strike

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The fact that the Seattle Public School teachers are on strike is very surreal to me. I've heard of strikes before, but I've never truly experienced one. It's never been something that has affected me before, especially since South Carolina, where I've lived most of my life, is a non-union state.

Since moving to Washington, I've realized that strikes really aren't that rare. Although, most of the time, life pretty much goes on as normal.

The teachers strike; however, is hitting us right at home.

I've previously covered the details of the strike and what each side is fighting for so I won't retell that, please see my post "The First Day of School...But Not Quite Yet" for that information.

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Zoey was supposed to start school on Wednesday, September 9. Today would have been her 5th day in school. Instead we are home, trying to enjoy our extended summer.

The problem is this...Zoey was really ready to go back to school. She was all prepared with her new school supplies stuffed into an Elsa backpack. She was ready to see her new classroom and her teacher. Most of all she was ready to see her friends again. I believe that is what she is missing the most.

I am trying to keep my anxiety as low as possible as we go through the days of unknown. The last time the teachers went on strike it took three weeks to get the issues resolved. That is a long time. Negotiations are proceeding, but things seem to be moving slowly. Only time will tell whether the latest agreement will move forward to allow the 53,000 kids to get into the classrooms for the 2015-2016 school year.

A little peek into our mornings lately. I used to do preschool activities like this with Zoey and now she wants to do first grade activities. It has been quite a fun adventure, though I know she will be glad to go to school.

I was all geared up for Zoey to go back to school as well. I was ready with all of my notes and tentative itinerary to get some serious writing done and new routines created. It feels like life just went on pause. It has been challenging balancing everyone's needs and making plans because our information is day to day.

I fully support what the teachers are fighting for, so we are making the best of our time. We're doing a few school lessons at home during this time, including writing in her journal, reading and completing activities in her 1st grade workbook. Seeing her eyes light up over learning and writing again let me know how excited she is about school. It warms my heart that she loves it, not only the social aspect, but also the academics.

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This is at Zoey's school, Lowell Elementary

In light of the strike, I am very thankful that our family has the flexibility so that Zoey can be home and that we do not have to find child care options. Since I went down to part time recently (a decision that keeps proving to be the absolute right choice), Stephen and I are able to easily tag team throughout the week so that one of us will be home and the other still gets all the work needed done in the week. I can not imagine the anxiety level I would have if we had to worry about that aspect of this strike like so many of the parents must.

At the end of it all, I am thankful to live in a place that will fight for our children and also what they need to fulfill their own needs. It is a struggle, but one well worth it. I know for one thing, I will not be taking school for granted, ever.

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The Incredible Phone Debacle

This is a true story...

We had just gotten back from a vacation to the east coast to visit our family and friends. It was a great trip, but it was nice to be home. I wasn't really incredibly excited to go back to work at Old Navy (I mean is anyone really excited to go back to work after a two week vacation?) I decided to dress up a little bit to give me a little extra confidence and a bounce in my step. Since it wasn't a shipment day, I decided to wear a denim skirt with a cute top.  It worked. The day was going really well, which gave me a huge boost about being back at work after two weeks. I went to lunch, came back in the building and used the bathroom before I went back on the floor.

I put my name tag on and reached for my phone which lived in my back pocket and it wasn't there. I freaked out on the inside (mostly because this isn't the first time I've lost my phone in the past year.) "It's got to be here somewhere" I think to myself. So, I started retracing my steps. I began in the break room and headed down to the floor. I looked in the bathroom, and even asked the person coming out if they saw a phone in there. Of course not. I went back outside to the spot I was sitting in the park looking all along the sidewalk as I went. Nothing. Nothing was turned in at the store. No one had seen anything. Damn.

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With my head bowed, I called Stephen. "You're going to kill me, but (deep breath) I can't find my phone."

Now let me take just a moment here so that you understand. Like I said before, this is not the first time I've lost my phone in the past year. The first time was on the day of my Old Navy interview and I left it in a Nordstrom bathroom by accident. It wasn't two minutes later I was in there looking for it and it was gone. Someone had stolen it. A very similar story to this one actually.

Stephen had been giving me a hard time about it since it happened (as he should). But I knew I couldn't let anything happen to this phone and I did. I felt terrible and defeated when I called Stephen from one of my co-workers phones.

Let me just say, I have the best husband ever. He knew I was serious as soon as the words escaped my mouth. However, not once did he say anything mean or joke about my perpetual stolen phone scenario. He just went into action.

"Did you check in your bag and coat?"
"Yes."
"Did you check where you had been this afternoon?"
"Yes."
"Even on the sidewalk?"
"Yes."
"Did you ask to see if someone turned a phone in?"
"Yes."
"Okay."
"Okay."

He began tracking my phone online. I love that feature. We determined it had for sure come back to Old Navy with me so as I thought, it fell out of my skirt in the bathroom, I simply didn't notice. We also determined that someone had it because it was walking down 3rd Ave and I was still standing in Old Navy on 5th.

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At this point I let my managers know what was going on. One manager offered to go with me and see if we could get it back. I stayed on the phone with Stephen (a huge thanks to my co-worker who lent me her phone.) We walked and Stephen set the ringer to go off as loud as it could for five minutes at a time. We looked and listened and found nothing. I was so sad and defeated when Stephen told me the person got on a bus because it was now 5 blocks south. We went back to Old Navy and I hung up with Stephen. I took a deep breath and then found the most monotonous task I could find and just kept working.

We had bricked my phone, meaning that no one could do anything with it. It had an elaborate password set to it so it couldn't even be opened. On top of that, Stephen wrote a message on the front screen that read (in capital letters) "THIS PHONE IS STOLEN, PLEASE RETURN TO OWNER." He added a link to his phone number, though that didn't do much good because we disabled the sim card so that no data or signal to get to the phone. When we did that, it was last tracked in West Seattle, which is a good 10 miles away.

Now don't get me wrong, I know that it was just a phone. It was a thing, something that could be replaced. I was upset, not distraught over this occurance. Mostly I was just annoyed, especially with myself for allowing it to happen (again) in the first place.

Anyone who has a smart phone that they use on a regular basis will understand this... not having that phone SUCKS! It is my alarm clock, my music player, my way to communicate (through phone and text), my entertainment, my link to the world through Facebook and news apps, and my way to get around town (with google maps and the bus schedule app). It has everything that I do and use on a daily basis in that one device. It was so much harder without it, so frustrating!

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I woke up the next day mad at the world. I was cursing before I even got in the shower. Frankly, I'm surprised I got up at all using a different alarm. But I did. I got dressed and I went to work and I endured the day. It was a hard day.

That evening I get a message from a co-worker on Facebook... "Hey Amanda! Your phone is at work!"

WHAT!?!

My phone is at work? That can't be! It was stolen, gone forever. Now it's at work? It can't be mine. But another co-worker (the one whose phone I borrowed) called Stephen to let us know as well and promised that it was mine.

I went to bed that night with a glimmer of hope. I didn't want to get my hopes up. Nonetheless, I hadn't been that excited to go to work in a long while. I got there and found my phone in the office on a charger! My Old Navy people are the most amazing in the world! Not only did they find it to give it back, they even charged it for me. [insert cheesy grin here]

I was on cloud nine all day because I got my phone back. I couldn't believe it!

Turns out, the person who stole it came back to Old Navy and put the phone back in the bathroom. One of the Old Navy associates found it in the bathroom and was like, "This is Amanda's phone." So I still have no idea who took it or what they hoped to gain from it, but honestly, I don't really care. I'm just so glad to have my phone back.

It's just as good as new too. It wasn't tampered with at all. It was still locked and not even damaged physically. Stephen (as the primary on the plan) got it recoverd and back on the network with a new sim card and now it works perfectly as if nothing happened at all. I am so lucky.

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Who ever it was that stole it, shame on you, but thank you for doing the right thing in the end and returning it, even anonymously. It saves me a lot of headache, frustration and money to get a new one.

At the end of those couple days, I felt like I was in a book or sitcom. I mean you can't write stuff this good. In fact, don't be surprised if a similar story comes up in my fiction in the future, I mean, I have to use this!

This instance also got me thinking. It is an interesting thing, my faith and contempt for humanity. I mean, there is so much violence and distruction it is hard to believe in the good of this world. But there are also so many instances where people help each other out just because it was needed at the time.

When my phone was stolen, I was furious with this unknown person for being so selfish and cruel. However, when it came back, even anonymously, I realized that everyone is going through their own struggles and we all walk a balance of self gain and self sacrifice.

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It gives me hope that this person did the right thing in the end and returned the phone, even if it was after realizing there was nothing to gain from the situation. Still, he or she could have been flippant or lazy and just toss it. Instead he or she made the trek back into the city to leave it where he or she stole it from. There is hope and good in this world. Sometimes, we just need to look a little harder for it and have faith that others will make the right decisions. In the meantime, we need to make the right decisions and realize that our actions and attitudes affect those around us.

Amanda

Happy Birthday, Husband!

Sunday was Stephen's birthday. It was a quiet day. It was perfect. We spent the day home, together. Also, we watched lots of football. It doesn't get much better than that.

Happy Birthday, my love!

Zoey was so excited about Stephen's birthday. I had to wake up and go to work for the early morning, but Stephen said the first thing out of her mouth that morning was, "Happy Birthday Daddy!" She is a pretty awesome girl, I know that meant the world to Stephen.

These two fill my heart to overflowing.

I think Zoey was possibly more excited about Stephen's birthday than he was!

Brownies are much better than cake, at least according to this one.

Zoey picked out Stephen's birthday present all by herself. As soon as he opened it, she set into explaining all the awesome things about the Lego set she picked out. I am sensing a common theme lately. Legos and more Legos!

It was a wonderful day. I'm glad we could make it special for Stephen, just by being together. My family means the world to me. My love for them grows deeper as each year passes. Who knew life could be this good?

My Cup Runs Over,

{Wordless Wednesday} Moving Day!

The first step on moving day was getting everything on the truck. Like I said before ("I'm Back to Writing, Live from Seattle") we have a lot of stuff, too much for our apartment probably. However, we won't know what we need and what we don't until we get it there. So we got rid of what we could and packed everything else. Thankfully, Amazon is moving us. These really nice guys came out and packed everything and put it on the truck for us. It is my kind of moving.

Our next step was to say goodbye to this house. It was the first house Stephen and I ever bought. It was also the only house Zoey ever knew. We brought her home from the hospital to this house. It is hardest for her I think. I can see all the flaws in the house and know somewhat about the adventure ahead of us. For Zoey, that house is simply her home and she is going into the unknown. She is doing amazing with the transition and even seems genuinely excited about it. I know I am.

The last leg was the flight from Charleston, SC to Seattle, WA. It isn't a bad flight it usually takes a total of six and a half hours in the air. This trip our layover was in Dallas, TX. It was just long enough for us to grab some pizza and board the plane. My favorite kind of layover. We got into Seattle at midnight local time; to us it felt like 3 a.m. Nonetheless, I was glad the day had finally reached an end. We were home.

So perhaps this wasn't quite a wordless Wednesday, but I am glad to share my adventures with you. It has been a crazy journey and we still aren't quite settled yet until we can unpack everything this upcoming weekend. I'm happy for this community because no matter where we physically are, I can come online and it always feels like home.

Link up and join in the Wordless Wednesday fun!

I'm Back To Writing, Live From Seattle!

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I have been absent from blogging for several weeks now and believe me when I say, I've missed it. However, I have been incredibly busy with a massive project -- moving our family 3,000 miles across the country.

We were so excited when my husband, Stephen, accepted a job with Amazon in Seattle, WA. However, we had no idea how chaotic our lives would become to make this move happen. We began to go through and pack things that have been lying around our house in Charleston, SC, many completely unused, for the last five and a half years. I had no realization as to how much stuff we actually had until confronted with the fact that we were moving from a 1500 square foot house into an 850 square foot apartment. Yep, we had way too much.

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Stephen's job is in the city and he really wanted to be able to walk to work. Besides, Stephen and I have always wanted the opportunity to live in the city and here it was now staring us in the face. We jumped at the thought, despite the sacrifice of space.

Seattle is absolutely beautiful and incredibly interesting. This is a city that I am excited to live in and truly experience. We can walk or use public transportation to pretty much anywhere we want. And we will still have our cars for Costco runs and camping trips.

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We are all set in our new apartment now. Granted I am writing this while lying on a blanket laid out on our bare living room floor. Obviously, since I am posting things again we finally got Internet, the next best thing to furniture. Thankfully, our furniture and belongings will arrive on Saturday. I can't wait. However, my hair is also damp from a dip in our apartment community pool, so things aren't all bad.

I'm most excited about our patio. It is huge and perfect for spending time outside. I am looking forward to beginning each day with a cup of coffee and my laptop or a book sitting outside facing the Puget Sound. Yes, I think city life will do just nicely.

A sneak peek into our new home

Now I am looking forward to ending my moving sabbatical and getting back to writing (so much more fun than packing). Though, you will probably hear me complaining about unpacking soon enough. Nonetheless, it's good to be home.

Greetings from Seattle!

{Garden Tales} Green Thumb?

One of my favorite things about spring is planting a garden. This year we made some drastic changes to our previous gardens. We moved it in the front yard (because we couldn't keep our dogs from eating the plants.) We made raised beds. And we planted more than we ever have before!

We began this project in March and finished planting the first week in April. It has been just over a month and I want to share the progress. I put the planting photo on the left and the recent photo on the right. (I actually took all these more recent pictures last week...it's amazing the difference a week can make because there is already more veggies coming in!) So the difference is really about 5 weeks (give or take a few days.)

Garden Bed 1

In this first garden bed, I planted from top to bottom: tomatoes, bell peppers, cabbage and sweet onions. Tomatoes and peppers are our favorite things to grow because we use them in everything. This bed is the least complicated and is one of the best growing. Everything is really coming along nicely.

Garden Bed 2

This bed has (from top to bottom): tomatoes, jalapenos, broccoli, flowers and basil. A couple of the broccoli plants died quickly so we replaced them with catnip on the left and chives on the right. Out of four small catnip plants only one survived, so I will probably put something else there soon. The chives, however, are doing quite well. I believe our flowers are getting too much late afternoon sun. It seems the ones in the front of the beds (which gets more afternoon sun) are withering and the ones in the back of the beds (which get more morning sun) are doing great. I am most excited by our basil in this bed because it is our most used herb. We are encouraging them to grow in bush-like form by harvesting from the top. I am very pleased to already be using most of our herbs!

Garden Bed 3

From top to bottom in this bed we have tomatoes, habanero, chili pepper, flowers, spinach, peppermint, cilantro, and flowers. We are having no luck at all with the spinach. With only the exception of a few spinach sprouts, we have replaced it. The spinach is one of the few plants we began from seeds, though it is the only one that failed in such epic fashion. It was replaced with dill on the left and sage on the right. So far, so good. The sage is especially taking off.

Garden Bed 4

This garden bed has (from top to bottom): cucumbers, zucchini, yellow squash, parsley, flowers, oregano and rosemary. The squash family is especially taking off. There are already several flowers budding of them, though it is hard to see in the picture for the leaves. The parsley is also doing great. We have used all the herbs so far.

Garden Bed 5

This final bed has (from top to bottom): bush green beans, flowers, iceberg lettuce, flowers, lavender and strawberries. The beans were from seeds and sprouted really quickly. They seem to be doing wonderfully. They are just now starting to flower, so hopefully we will begin to see little beans soon. The lettuce was also from seeds and it is doing okay. We have never had very good luck with lettuce, but we wanted to try it in our new garden. We'll see. All the plants are growing, but I don't know how much we will actually be able to harvest. I love having the lavender right by the door. I get a whiff of it every time I leave or enter the house and it is so calming and happy. And it is thriving! Last time I tried lavender it died almost immediately, but this time it is beautiful! The strawberries are wonderful. We have already eaten three off of it. Zoey was excited to eat the first one a couple weeks ago right before her baseball game.

Zoey still helps me water the garden all the time, but this picture was taken right after we planted.

I absolutely love our garden. I don't have a green thumb. I have been know to kill flower plants in days. However, it seems that when I can harvest food and herbs from it, I do okay at keeping it alive at least. It is a wonderful thing for Zoey and I to work on together during the week. We go outside and weed, adjust and water the plants at least two or three times a week. It is nice to get outside because of course when we are done we play, which is always a joy.

I am glad to share this love of gardening with Zoey at such a young age. My mom and dad shared a love of gardening with me ever since I was born. I loved being outside with them helping out and reaping the benefits with a plenty of fresh grown veggies. I am glad I can teach Zoey what my parents taught me and be excited with her as we learn about and experience nature.

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Happy Spring!